Common Chronic Illnesses

• Asthma
•  Diabetes
• Sickle Cell Anemia
• Osteoporosis
• Cancer
• AIDS/HIV
• Leukemia
• Hemophilia
• Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
• Cardiovascular Diseases
• Chronic Respiratory Diseases

 Chronic illnesses are best thought of as a health condition that lasts for a minimum of 6 months. Frequently chronic illnesses are life long.  The degree to which a chronic illness effects ones life expectancy, life-style, sports, child-rearing decisions, work-life etc is highly dependent upon the specific type of illness, and the way an individual learns to manage it.  We strongly encourage working closely with your doctor to learn how to medically manage your illness and working with a therapist, trained in your specific illness to help you develop coping mechanisms to maximize your life situation. Your are not alone. Millions of people throughout the world have struggled to manage chronic illnesses. 

Having a chronic illness is emotionally stressful and frequently physically demanding.  Managing certain chronic illnesses may require an individual to always have on them special food or medication.  If a diabetic has an episode, the person around them may need to know how to administer sugar, or give them a shot.  At times a person’s survival is dependent upon the skills of others around them.  Knowing that one is ‘different’ than others at times can feel frustrating, isolating, humiliating, and demoralizing.  Being around someone who needs special attention can be draining, frustrating, scary and even rewarding.   Communication is key.  By recognizing ones’ person needs and then sharing them with others, enables the other persons to a) better meet the needs of the person with a chronic illness or b) decide that this is something that she or he does not want in their life and then figure out a way to distance him or herself. 

Tips for a partner, parent or partner of someone with a chronic illness:

•  A person with the chronic illness is probably having a more difficult time coping with the situation than you are.  You do not have to live with the daily realities of the illness.  If the person with the chronic illness does not seem to be negatively impacted by their situation, just remember they are more likely to have had many more years than you to adjust to the situation.  Your job is a balance of being true to yourself and being empathetic / helpful to the person when they need assistance. The key is setting boundaries. Know your limits and communicate them. 
• Don’t outcast the individual! Every wants to blend in.  People living with a chronic illness want to be able to have the same choices about lifestyles as you do.  If their illness has forced them to make certain decisions, they may benefit from your ability to hear their grief.  Help create a space where the sadness can be discussed.  Your job is not to fix the situation, but rather to listen to their pain as they learn to adjust to their situation.  While their may be certain activities that the person can no longer engage, try to find activities that each of you can participate in together.   
• When a family member has a chronic illness do not be afraid to talk openly about the situation. Holding secrets can become more problematic than the actual secret. Giving voice to a situation can be validating to all those involved.  While we strongly encourage sharing ones feelings with each others, there may be boundaries as to what should get shared and what should not.  A discussion between a husband and wife with a chronic illness will look different than a mother and a young child with a chronic illness.   Joining a support group, reading literature specific to the chronic illness or working with a therapist can prove invaluable.

When seeking therapy, it is always preferable to choose a therapist who has experience working with the specific condition that you would like to focus on. If you have never tried family therapy, marriage counseling, couples counseling or individual therapy before, we strongly encourage you to make several first appointments. Then choose which person you felt the most comfortable with.  Just because a person is technically qualified does not mean that you will like the person. Similiarly just because you like the therapist, does not mean that the therapist is skilled in that particular area.  A good fit therapeutic fit is a combination of skill, technique and chemistry between the therapist and the client.